i realli miss my tua gu de..sick of being looked down by pple who always goes "ee,he ridin small bike,useless de la"or "wat can he do on a small bike" and "i dun wanna sit on small bikes" i'm not tryin to be egoistic or materialistic..but juz tat over time,it does realli impact on my confidence level..things i do i will start to question my own abilites , capabilites , determination and will. does this kinda riches realli determines how gd a person is?
i used to be quite well off de..haf enuff cash to spent,rides a big bike,haf my freedom..until the day my family and me got into some money problems and mi gettin into army,all this riches started to disappear.. it's when real reality starts to surface,the ugly and materialistic side of pple.. pple whu will look down on u,compare u wif other pple,say things about u even though they know u r tryin hard.. i'm realli tired of all this le..i dun regret being poor,i juz regret being born as a deep thinker.
no matter how close siblings/families/friends/bf/gf is to u..when u r down and out,one day if ever something concernin this kinda materialistic prob comes out..there's no promise none of them will leave u in the lurch. tat's y everybody muz always cherish the pple around them,neber take them 4 granted. haiz..realli.. do we realli haf to disappear sometimes ? maybe 4 pple to cherish u more? hmm..tat i dunno ..neber tried b4...maybe it's time ba...hahah.. time to tink over wat i wan in life..i'm so tired of my life now..it's always in shambles..hafin to worry about this/tat,always gettin hurt,i wanna piece back my life,neber to get hurt again and get look down again..
this song i haf heard a long time ago.. "forever love" by x-japan.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YDVZaTld9w it's a beri sad song written for hideto..which was from the band x-japan.. who commited suicide.. hope u all like it..

sometimes i ponder about this while in the midst of gettin to sleep..does god realli exists? pple always say god will be there 4 u if u realli haf difficulties..or if u haf difficulties they will say god is puttin u thru this test...how true is all this? i mean it's all personal perference to believe in it or not..but 4 mi,no ba..went thru quite alot things tat proved power and riches is more dependable den believin in god..
If god is realli there 4 mi,y does he always haf to constantly put mi thru "tests",if tat is too make mi grow up..how bout those whu live their live with the most minimum prob in their life? how fair is tat? den after i say this..sure got pple will say ..wat u get this lifetime is the karma u accumulated in ur past life..wtf..whu knows whether wat we r or who r we or even do we realli exists b4 and after this lifetime.. strange as pple may tink about mi tokin bout all this things..but it's realli worth tinkin about..
when u're realli down and out,face all sort of probs..do u realli expect miracles to happen? someone to jump out and say i will free u of all ur probs? i dun mean it wun happen to pple..but even got..all those r either ur families members or close friends..is tat suppose to be called a miracle? NOW..pple will say again..it is bcoz of ur gd fortune god blessed u wif all this pple whu helped u... -_- choosin friends and whether to be close to our families members is all up to us..y put god into picture?
after wat i said..i hope pple would seriously go and tink..is god juz a "thing" tat pple made up to blame or praise when something gd or bad happen to them? like a pillar of support 4 their confidence and determination..or is it realli true? i leave it 4 everyone to choose ba... haha.. gtg again...

Seh~ todae neber go camp again...sure gonna get shit from my master sarge william "doraemon"..haha..will conclude y i so " reject " him later on de.. haha..as my ord date is nearing..i'm becomin lazier and lazier..lolx sumtimes cant even stand myself in camp..tok cork,smoke,slack...until time comes..go home..hehe. ya..but it's part and parcel of army life de..so ani guys haben goin in ns...learn from mi.
But as my release date is comin soon,worries start to appear le..things like "will i make it in society""can i find a gd job" "will i be able to support my love ones and family" start appearin in my mind. sometimes, army is quite a gd place to hide urself from all this trouble de..though we juz doin the same things all over and over again every min,hour,day..but at least we dun haf to face the harsh reality of real society.. the competitive lvl,limited job opportunities,salaries prob all this.. livin in singapore is realli tough.. once u cant catch up wif issues and stuffs here..u r considered redunant and will be outcasted. haha..i've alot comments on how our government werks..but better not ba..dun wanna get into lawsuits and stuffs. THIS IS HOW BAD IT IS..WE CANT EVEN WRITE DOWN OUR OWN THINKINGS AND HOW WE FEEL ABOUT OUR OWN COUNTRY HERE..ya..can write..but onli gd stuffs..lolx..do anione tink so.. oops..abit off topic le.. about my master sarge..haha..he is a funni person,he is wat i called a "incapable" leader,indecisive,gan chiong,tok alot neber do..gettin so sianz of camp le..alot of internal politics in camp too..u dun like mi,i dun like him,he hate his shit~ all this..lolx
hopefully everyday i can juz be livin happily,day by day until the day i pass on..i will be happi le..tink i tok enuff crap le..haha..this concludes everything of " WHAT MR LIAO IS TINKIN NOW"...hope to hear some comments ba... :)

haha..everyone..this is my first blog ever set up in my life...know it sounds gay..but wtf..i juz haf to bear wif it..dun wanna wait till when i'm 70-80 den realise i neber keep a record of my life..
:)